Funerals & Children

Can or should children attend a funeral? As adults, the challenge is often to share enough information regarding death without saying too MUCH or too LITTLE. Children naturally begin to understand death as toddlers and youngsters (pets, insects, etc.). Every situation is different, but children can benefit from attending a funeral. Nothing replaces the judgment of a parent/guardian because you know your child the best, but I would encourage parents to think about how to teach children about death in a healthy, age appropriate way. Death is a natural part of life and we aren't helping children by sheltering them from it. We can find ways to be honest with them without sharing details that would be traumatic to them. I'm always happy to talk with parents about how to approach this subject with children of all ages.

Karen Gannon Griffith shared the below information in a seminar she led at the GSCA Fall Conference 2006.

Can Children Attend a Funeral?

If a child can attend a wedding, then can attend a funeral
➢ Is child old enough to sit quietly for that length of time?
➢ Is child old enough not to disrupt the ceremony?
➢ Is child old enough to let adults do what they have to do?

It can be a helpful experience
➢ Closure
➢ Learning experience
➢ Part of life

Educate and explain before you go
➢ It is a ceremony that happens when someone dies.
➢ What might they see?
➢ Where/when will it take place?
➢ What kind of clothing is appropriate?
➢ It is OK to cry – in fact, many might be crying
➢ What will happen after the ceremony?